I Want to Be a Wall Volume 2.
I Want to Be a Wall Volume 2
This is my review of Volume 2 of I Want to Be a Wall. Yuriko's apprehension towards Gakurouta getting in the BL is kind of odd, as she obviously feels that he can't handle BL (or he will see it as a gross misrepresentation of gay men), but surely that is decision he can reach on his own as after all, he is his own man who and needs no woman to tell him what to think. Besides, his interest in BL comes from a desire to know her better, as not knowing key things about each other is the main source of friction in this relationship.
Sousuke has come round to do some work and the sight of him in his work clothes can be a bit too stimulating for Gakurouta. During a break, he asks how the 2 met and they answer with “match-making session”, before explaining further via flashback from Yuriko’s POV.
The match-making session took place at a fancy Japanese restaurant and Yuriko has been dragged there by her mother. She is then formally introduced to Gakurouta who looks in a worser condition than she does. They begin a walk alone where Gakurouta confesses that he’s not ready for marriage and goes into a long spiel which prompts Yuriko to ask if he was forced to come and the answer is yes. This is a weight off of her shoulders as she was planning to reject him anyway, but seeing as the rejection is mutual. They sit down and Gakurouta explains that the only partner he wants is someone understands his desire not to marry as well as someone he can trust and he is only here to appease his grandmother who is his only relative left. Yuriko understands as she too isn’t interested in marriage and is here to appease her mother and they talk some more, Gakurouta reveals his unrequited love and they finish by agree never to see each other again.
3 months later, they meet each other and go out for a drink and begin to talk. Gakurouta reveals he is still being set up and still breaking hearts as well as meeting with his crush who is his childhood best friend and works part-time a flower shop that his sister runs whilst also some odd gardening jobs he inherited from his grandfather who was employed by the Hanazono family as a gardener. He also reveals that his crush looks like a flower blooming when smiling. They finish their drinks and head out where they encounter Sousuke and Yuriko is introduced as a coworker of Gakurouta and Sousuke as Gakurouta’s childhood friend. Sousuke can’t hang around as he is keeping his sister waiting in her van that advertises her floristry business, but he flashes them a smile that looks like flowers blooming. Yuriko puts 2 and 2 together and works out who Gakurouta’s crush is and in an attempt to prevent him from distancing himself from her, confesses her love for Boys Love and is okay with gay people. She takes him out for more drinks and eventually ends up at his house. Upon returning home, her parents give the couple their blessing and now have keep on meeting each other as a ‘couple’.
They get used to their new situation and end up becoming good friends, but after an impromptu visit to Gakurouta’s grandmother when she suddenly falls ill (with a common cold), Yuriko end up promising to her that she will look after him and realises that she has effectively committed to marrying him and apologises in a hospital hallway. Gakurouta suggests that they do get married, but continue their relationship as it is now and proposes to her right there and then.
We return to the present and as Sousuke leaves, Gakurouta thanks Yuriko for accepting his selfish proposal on that day as he realised that if he could see Yuriko more often (e.g: everyday) returning home every day would be less lonely. However, unbeknownst to him, she had already briefly envisioned this probability, back when she stayed over at his house as she could’ve gone home but chose not. Meanwhile Sousuke is feeling selfish that he is starting to miss just him and Gakurouta.
The match-making session took place at a fancy Japanese restaurant and Yuriko has been dragged there by her mother. She is then formally introduced to Gakurouta who looks in a worser condition than she does. They begin a walk alone where Gakurouta confesses that he’s not ready for marriage and goes into a long spiel which prompts Yuriko to ask if he was forced to come and the answer is yes. This is a weight off of her shoulders as she was planning to reject him anyway, but seeing as the rejection is mutual. They sit down and Gakurouta explains that the only partner he wants is someone understands his desire not to marry as well as someone he can trust and he is only here to appease his grandmother who is his only relative left. Yuriko understands as she too isn’t interested in marriage and is here to appease her mother and they talk some more, Gakurouta reveals his unrequited love and they finish by agree never to see each other again.
3 months later, they meet each other and go out for a drink and begin to talk. Gakurouta reveals he is still being set up and still breaking hearts as well as meeting with his crush who is his childhood best friend and works part-time a flower shop that his sister runs whilst also some odd gardening jobs he inherited from his grandfather who was employed by the Hanazono family as a gardener. He also reveals that his crush looks like a flower blooming when smiling. They finish their drinks and head out where they encounter Sousuke and Yuriko is introduced as a coworker of Gakurouta and Sousuke as Gakurouta’s childhood friend. Sousuke can’t hang around as he is keeping his sister waiting in her van that advertises her floristry business, but he flashes them a smile that looks like flowers blooming. Yuriko puts 2 and 2 together and works out who Gakurouta’s crush is and in an attempt to prevent him from distancing himself from her, confesses her love for Boys Love and is okay with gay people. She takes him out for more drinks and eventually ends up at his house. Upon returning home, her parents give the couple their blessing and now have keep on meeting each other as a ‘couple’.
They get used to their new situation and end up becoming good friends, but after an impromptu visit to Gakurouta’s grandmother when she suddenly falls ill (with a common cold), Yuriko end up promising to her that she will look after him and realises that she has effectively committed to marrying him and apologises in a hospital hallway. Gakurouta suggests that they do get married, but continue their relationship as it is now and proposes to her right there and then.
We return to the present and as Sousuke leaves, Gakurouta thanks Yuriko for accepting his selfish proposal on that day as he realised that if he could see Yuriko more often (e.g: everyday) returning home every day would be less lonely. However, unbeknownst to him, she had already briefly envisioned this probability, back when she stayed over at his house as she could’ve gone home but chose not. Meanwhile Sousuke is feeling selfish that he is starting to miss just him and Gakurouta.
An touring art exhibition of Yuriko’s favourite manga (Haru and Matsu) is going to be in Kochi next month, which is important as the series is set in Kochi as that is where the manga author is from. Yuriko is hesitant about going as it is 6 hours by bullet train, but Gakurouta finds out that is only 1 hour by plane, so Kochi can be done in a day and he is also a fan of Ryoma Sakamoto (1836-1867), a Edo period (1603-1868) samurai and advocate for democracy from Kochi, so they decide to go together.
Before takeoff, Yuriko realises that this is their first trip together and is determined for Gakurouta to have good time. However, Gakurouta is a nervous flyer as he has never flown before. They land with no issue and begin to look round Kochi, with Gakurouta snapping pictures at bridges, statues, old electric train cars, etc with Yuriko always in frame. Meanwhile, Yuriko is snapping pictures of famous locations from Haru and Matsu and her enthusiasm is incomprehensible to Gakurouta to the point he fears he will never be able to truly understand her. They head over to the gallery where the exhibition is and Gakurouta is the only male visitor around. He asks if she wants a photo and suggests including a cut-out of the main characters which she agrees to and poses behind the cut-out, by trying to blend in to the wall.
They leave the gallery and Gakurouta takes more scenic photos and gets all serious about it, which internally concerns Yuriko a bit. This is because Gakurouta doesn’t openly share details about himself, which makes sense when he has unrequited love towards his best friend and if that secret got out, his life would be socially over (remember Yuriko worked out who his crush was based off what he told her). This secretiveness worries Yuriko, as she fears she won’t notice him getting bored of her and seeking someone else to spend the rest of his life with. They go and have lunch, where Yuriko asks more about photography hobby and Gakurouta reveals that he learned photography whilst at high school and university and still has photos from back then - on his social media. He is a bit popular on social media, despite it being nothing but photos, as he has about 697 friends. This other side to him alienates Yuriko and after the meal, she asks more about his hobby. He reveals that since graduating school, he has only picked up a camera once since: to attempt photograph a sleeping Sousuke on a porch, but didn’t follow through as he was scared about being caught with the photo. The mood has worsened, but a distraction appears thanks to a lost child who mistakes Gakurouta for her daddy.
The child speaks English, which is fine for Yuriko as she obviously speaks English but Gakurouta doesn’t. Yuriko finds out that the lost girl’s name is Cindy and some details about her daddy, so goes off to find him and leaves the ones who can’t understand each other. Cindy says that Yuriko is nice and asks if she is his girlfriend, but before Gakurouta can properly explain his relationship, Cindy’s daddy physically confronts him, but Yuriko is there explain the situation - Gakurouta is her husband. With the situation smoothed over, Gakurouta expresses his surprise that Yuriko can speak English and Yuriko admits it’s only good for everyday conversations. Gakurouta confesses that, despite being married to her, he knows nothing about her. This amuses Yuriko, as she felt the same towards him but seeing as they only met about a year ago, this is to be expected and the only things the need to not miss about are the important ones. Yuriko admits that she enjoyed today and Gakurouta agrees. On the plane, Yuriko suggests that Gakurouta should choose the next place to visit, while Gakurouta updates his relationship status on his social media to “married”.
Before takeoff, Yuriko realises that this is their first trip together and is determined for Gakurouta to have good time. However, Gakurouta is a nervous flyer as he has never flown before. They land with no issue and begin to look round Kochi, with Gakurouta snapping pictures at bridges, statues, old electric train cars, etc with Yuriko always in frame. Meanwhile, Yuriko is snapping pictures of famous locations from Haru and Matsu and her enthusiasm is incomprehensible to Gakurouta to the point he fears he will never be able to truly understand her. They head over to the gallery where the exhibition is and Gakurouta is the only male visitor around. He asks if she wants a photo and suggests including a cut-out of the main characters which she agrees to and poses behind the cut-out, by trying to blend in to the wall.
They leave the gallery and Gakurouta takes more scenic photos and gets all serious about it, which internally concerns Yuriko a bit. This is because Gakurouta doesn’t openly share details about himself, which makes sense when he has unrequited love towards his best friend and if that secret got out, his life would be socially over (remember Yuriko worked out who his crush was based off what he told her). This secretiveness worries Yuriko, as she fears she won’t notice him getting bored of her and seeking someone else to spend the rest of his life with. They go and have lunch, where Yuriko asks more about photography hobby and Gakurouta reveals that he learned photography whilst at high school and university and still has photos from back then - on his social media. He is a bit popular on social media, despite it being nothing but photos, as he has about 697 friends. This other side to him alienates Yuriko and after the meal, she asks more about his hobby. He reveals that since graduating school, he has only picked up a camera once since: to attempt photograph a sleeping Sousuke on a porch, but didn’t follow through as he was scared about being caught with the photo. The mood has worsened, but a distraction appears thanks to a lost child who mistakes Gakurouta for her daddy.
The child speaks English, which is fine for Yuriko as she obviously speaks English but Gakurouta doesn’t. Yuriko finds out that the lost girl’s name is Cindy and some details about her daddy, so goes off to find him and leaves the ones who can’t understand each other. Cindy says that Yuriko is nice and asks if she is his girlfriend, but before Gakurouta can properly explain his relationship, Cindy’s daddy physically confronts him, but Yuriko is there explain the situation - Gakurouta is her husband. With the situation smoothed over, Gakurouta expresses his surprise that Yuriko can speak English and Yuriko admits it’s only good for everyday conversations. Gakurouta confesses that, despite being married to her, he knows nothing about her. This amuses Yuriko, as she felt the same towards him but seeing as they only met about a year ago, this is to be expected and the only things the need to not miss about are the important ones. Yuriko admits that she enjoyed today and Gakurouta agrees. On the plane, Yuriko suggests that Gakurouta should choose the next place to visit, while Gakurouta updates his relationship status on his social media to “married”.
While on the way home, Gakurouta gets a call from Yuriko telling her she won't need dinner tonight as she has just met up with a friend they have decided to go out for food. This is of no issue for Gakurouta however later, he spots Yuriko hugging a guy and as they head off, he put his arm on her shoulder. This concerns Gakurouta as Yuriko is very good with physical contact with other people, so understands this unknown guy must be basically family to her. He decides not to be bothered by this revelation, even if it irritates him, as A: a good husband trust his wife and needs not comment on her relationships, and B: he has no moral high ground when it comes to platonic friendships. He then relaxes by watching Tv, but the drama that is on has a woman (whose name is similar to his wife's) pleading with a man to realise that they are just friends despite staying out and drinking alcohol with him. This makes Gakurouta worry as while Yuriko may see her friend as only a friend, he may want to take their relationship further. Yuriko returns home to a worried Gakurouta as along with the previously mentioned fantasy, she hasn't been responding to his messages (her phone's battery had died). Yuriko enjoyed her time with her friend announces that she won't need dinner tomorrow, as she is again going out with him.
After this, Yuriko regularly meets her friend on weekends and while Gakurouta is happy that she is having fun with him, he has a nightmare where she leaves him to get married to her friend, leaving him all alone. Yuriko is going to meet her friend again today, so Gakurouta offers to drive her to the meeting spot (he plans on going shopping) and asks about her friend. Yuriko explains that she met him in USA while studying and that he is bisexual, has had lots of lovers, and was candid about that, which really helped Yuriko as she was coming to terms with her asexuality at that time. Not only is he a close friend, he is also one of her biggest supporters. This eases Gakurouta's worries about him, but he ends up crossing paths with them multiple times whilst shopping. He hangs around them like BL fan does around a cut-out of the OTP, catching excerpts of their conversations which all sound like conversations that couples would have. One of those conversations involve the purchase of engagement rings, which dredge up nightmares for Gakurouta. Eventually, Yuriko and her friend separate (she needs the toilet) and that allows him to confront the man that has seemingly been stalking Yuriko. In an effort to clear the air, Gakurouta confesses that he is Yuriko's partner.
After this, Yuriko regularly meets her friend on weekends and while Gakurouta is happy that she is having fun with him, he has a nightmare where she leaves him to get married to her friend, leaving him all alone. Yuriko is going to meet her friend again today, so Gakurouta offers to drive her to the meeting spot (he plans on going shopping) and asks about her friend. Yuriko explains that she met him in USA while studying and that he is bisexual, has had lots of lovers, and was candid about that, which really helped Yuriko as she was coming to terms with her asexuality at that time. Not only is he a close friend, he is also one of her biggest supporters. This eases Gakurouta's worries about him, but he ends up crossing paths with them multiple times whilst shopping. He hangs around them like BL fan does around a cut-out of the OTP, catching excerpts of their conversations which all sound like conversations that couples would have. One of those conversations involve the purchase of engagement rings, which dredge up nightmares for Gakurouta. Eventually, Yuriko and her friend separate (she needs the toilet) and that allows him to confront the man that has seemingly been stalking Yuriko. In an effort to clear the air, Gakurouta confesses that he is Yuriko's partner.
Gakurouta begins to interrogate Yuriko's friend, asking for his name, date of birth, occupation, and phone number. Before the friend can answer that, Yuriko reappears. The misunderstandings are cleared up and we learn Yuriko's friend's name - Shou Momoya. They have all gathered at a family restaurant which is having a promotional tie-in with 'Prince of Table-Tennis' (this universe's 'Prince of Tennis') and Yuriko and Shou have ordered the promotional meal item, outing themselves to Gakurouta as fan of BL (Prince of Tennis is known for its pretty boys, so it stands to reason Prince of Table-Tennis would be the same). The constant trips out on the weekend are to this restaurant as each week has a file folder for different characters and true fans must collect all characters (especially those from their favourite ship). Shou explains that he knows that the other 2 are married to each other with Yuriko providing further commentary on his reaction which was the hug from Chapter 9. The engagement rings misunderstanding is also explained as Shou is getting married and Yuriko was helping him with planning with the wedding as she knows his partner. Gakurouta is relieved that Yuriko is leaving him and he is not the only one as Shou is relieved to have met the man that his asexual friend married (he doesn't know the truth) as they look like a great pair but threatens Gakurouta not to make Yuriko cry. This will unfortunately be the last time Yuriko will be able to meet Shou for awhile, as he is heading to England for work, but before he leaves he shows a picture of his fiance. After saying their goodbyes, Gakurouta asks if Shou knows about him and his feelings towards Sousuke, the answer is no, as well as they should invite him round to their house to set the record straight on their relationship.
On the car ride home, Yuriko apologises for making Gakurouta worry and if she makes him feel uneasy again, he should let her know. Gakurouta also wants her to tell him something: if she finds someone else she rather spend her life with, he must be the first to know as he hopes to someday to be family to her. Yuriko asks similar of him, but Gakurouta dismisses this possibility as he can only ever see him loving (romantically) Sousuke. Gakurouta asks if Yuriko is going to the restaurant again next week, which she is, and if so, could he tag along as he really enjoyed the promotional meal item and thinks they should eat out more often. Yuriko accepts and is happy, brightening the mood between the pair.
On the car ride home, Yuriko apologises for making Gakurouta worry and if she makes him feel uneasy again, he should let her know. Gakurouta also wants her to tell him something: if she finds someone else she rather spend her life with, he must be the first to know as he hopes to someday to be family to her. Yuriko asks similar of him, but Gakurouta dismisses this possibility as he can only ever see him loving (romantically) Sousuke. Gakurouta asks if Yuriko is going to the restaurant again next week, which she is, and if so, could he tag along as he really enjoyed the promotional meal item and thinks they should eat out more often. Yuriko accepts and is happy, brightening the mood between the pair.
Gakurouta finds a box full of BL books, which Yuriko intends to donate to a 2nd hand shop as they were purchases judged on their cover and the content wasn't to her taste. Gakurouta is unsure what could be the disconnect between the cover and the books' contents until he opens one up and is presented with a lot of gay sex scenes.
Whilst out at a bookshop, Gakurouta notices a BL book and buys it, but is hesitant to open in it on the off chance it has explicit sex scenes. He is then surprised when a masked gentleman calls out him and this masked gentleman is Shou. The 2 go off for a walk where Shou thanks Gakurouta for having him over the other day and non-quietly expresses his surprise about Gakurouta's sexuality, who his crush is, and the truth about his marriage before he apologises for the volume of his voice. He continues on, saying that the fake marriage explains the vibes their relationship had as well as Gakurouta's initial worry over him being Yuriko's friend (he sees it as a son questioning his mother's choice of friends). Regardless of its truthfulness, he wants their relationship to succeed as he believes that there should be more relationships like it (society is SO demanding that you must be in love with the person you intend to spend your entire life with). Shou tells him if there's anything he feels he can't talk to Yuriko about, he should come to him and Gakurouta immediately takes him on that offer. The issue he wants to talk to Shou about is the frequency of explicit sex scenes in BL and Shou confirms that it is par for the course for most titles in genre to have copious amounts of explicit sex, but there are those which don't and he willing to give him a list of recommendations.
The topic of conversation turns to why Yuriko reads BL as she is neither a boy nor capable of romantic and sexual love. As the lady in question is not around to explain herself (though we, the audience, already know thanks to the flashback in Chapter 6), Shou answers in her stead using sweetness as a proxy for love, as if someone couldn't taste sweetness, there would be no point them ordering sweet things such as desserts (romantic stories). However, taste is not the only way to enjoy a dessert, as one can enjoy its smells, its texture, the way it looks or the way other people look when they taste the sweetness and after all, everyone is different and therefore will have different preferences to who they love. Yuriko may be incapable of romance and sexual desire, that doesn't means she doesn't see the beauty in it. To further illustrate his point, Shou talks about Synaesthesia (Americans will spell is without the a), which is a neurological condition in which people can perceive colours, smells, sounds, etc with pictures, words, sounds, etc. Shou explains that to Yuriko, we all have a type of synaesthesia, in which we can perceive romantic feelings when meeting certain people. Gakurouta understands what he means and agrees with him.
They head home and Shou asks about Sousuke and Gakurouta reveals that he isn't the only one who sees the attractiveness in him, as Sousuke has had lot of girlfriends and has one right now in fact. Meanwhile, Yuriko answers a call from the nursing home that houses Gakurouta's grandmother which explains that she will need to come home for a bit as the nursing home will short-staffed in a bit, owing to the upcoming winter holidays. As soon as that phone call is over, someone is banging on the front door, demanding that it is opened up before doing it herself. Once visible to Yuriko, the uninvited guest accuses her of being the girl that Sousuke is cheating on her with.
The bonus chapter in this volume is about Shou receiving Christmas gifts from his lover and his lover's mother and being appreciative of both. If you are wondering who his lover is: it is Gilbert, the guy who suggested that Yuriko might be asexual back in Seattle, Washington, USA.
Whilst out at a bookshop, Gakurouta notices a BL book and buys it, but is hesitant to open in it on the off chance it has explicit sex scenes. He is then surprised when a masked gentleman calls out him and this masked gentleman is Shou. The 2 go off for a walk where Shou thanks Gakurouta for having him over the other day and non-quietly expresses his surprise about Gakurouta's sexuality, who his crush is, and the truth about his marriage before he apologises for the volume of his voice. He continues on, saying that the fake marriage explains the vibes their relationship had as well as Gakurouta's initial worry over him being Yuriko's friend (he sees it as a son questioning his mother's choice of friends). Regardless of its truthfulness, he wants their relationship to succeed as he believes that there should be more relationships like it (society is SO demanding that you must be in love with the person you intend to spend your entire life with). Shou tells him if there's anything he feels he can't talk to Yuriko about, he should come to him and Gakurouta immediately takes him on that offer. The issue he wants to talk to Shou about is the frequency of explicit sex scenes in BL and Shou confirms that it is par for the course for most titles in genre to have copious amounts of explicit sex, but there are those which don't and he willing to give him a list of recommendations.
The topic of conversation turns to why Yuriko reads BL as she is neither a boy nor capable of romantic and sexual love. As the lady in question is not around to explain herself (though we, the audience, already know thanks to the flashback in Chapter 6), Shou answers in her stead using sweetness as a proxy for love, as if someone couldn't taste sweetness, there would be no point them ordering sweet things such as desserts (romantic stories). However, taste is not the only way to enjoy a dessert, as one can enjoy its smells, its texture, the way it looks or the way other people look when they taste the sweetness and after all, everyone is different and therefore will have different preferences to who they love. Yuriko may be incapable of romance and sexual desire, that doesn't means she doesn't see the beauty in it. To further illustrate his point, Shou talks about Synaesthesia (Americans will spell is without the a), which is a neurological condition in which people can perceive colours, smells, sounds, etc with pictures, words, sounds, etc. Shou explains that to Yuriko, we all have a type of synaesthesia, in which we can perceive romantic feelings when meeting certain people. Gakurouta understands what he means and agrees with him.
They head home and Shou asks about Sousuke and Gakurouta reveals that he isn't the only one who sees the attractiveness in him, as Sousuke has had lot of girlfriends and has one right now in fact. Meanwhile, Yuriko answers a call from the nursing home that houses Gakurouta's grandmother which explains that she will need to come home for a bit as the nursing home will short-staffed in a bit, owing to the upcoming winter holidays. As soon as that phone call is over, someone is banging on the front door, demanding that it is opened up before doing it herself. Once visible to Yuriko, the uninvited guest accuses her of being the girl that Sousuke is cheating on her with.
The bonus chapter in this volume is about Shou receiving Christmas gifts from his lover and his lover's mother and being appreciative of both. If you are wondering who his lover is: it is Gilbert, the guy who suggested that Yuriko might be asexual back in Seattle, Washington, USA.

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